one I said I'd write awhile ago, but forgot about until now

BREAKING NEWS: Caleb Eats Meat

The other evening, I recieved a phone call from Mr. Macdonald, explaining that he was compromising his values and eating roast beef. I was shocked, and asked why, WHY?! would he think that eating animal protein was a good idea? He said it was necessary to keep his health in order. I was confused. I thought you took supplements, Caleb? What could possibly have happened that caused you to disregard your beliefs?

His explanation:

"Amanda, the video game is oppressing me! It made me eat meat! I HAD NO CHOICE! I would have DIED!"

Said video game should be burned for causing my friend to have to endure such a traumatic experience.